Separation of parents is one of the most traumatic experiences for kids. Most children, in such a situation, experience insecurity and are seen to exhibit different kinds of reactions depending on their age and personality. At times, this phase of emotional crisis affects their health and social relationships too. However, parents can successfully help their kids to cope up with this reality and to accept it gracefully. The following tips may help parents help their child come to terms with the harsh reality of divorce:
- No more fights
- Act maturely
- Break the ice gently
- The kid’s view
- Keep life fun-filled
Generally, during a divorce the relationship between spouses turns bitter. However, for the sake of your kid, you need to maintain a healthy environment at home. Regular fights and heated arguments between you and your spouse will only add to the tension and disturb your child.
There are instances when kids have blamed themselves for the separation of their parents. Hence, it is extremely important to avoid any kind of conflicts in front of your kid and mutually work towards maintaining a stress-free environment at home.
Though it might sound difficult, you have to make a conscious effort not to drag your kid in the fray or burden your child with details of the situation. In most cases, parents turn their kids into messengers and make them act as negotiators, which is detrimental to them. In some cases, parents also try to make their kids take sides, which confuse and demoralize them totally.
As a parent, you need to act in a mature way and try to avoid doing these with your kid. You also need to take care that you do not badmouth or criticize your spouse in any way in front of your child.
Breaking the news of your divorce is a sensitive part and needs co-operation of both the parents. The right kind of communication with your child about the separation will help the child to accept the fact normally. You have to think of placing the truth in a simple manner taking into account the age of your child.
Whatever be the statement, the child should understand that the separation is between the parents and not between the child and the parents. Your kid should be assured that both of you will be around whenever the need arises and also that both of will equally spend time with your child.
It is natural for your kid to have lots of questions regarding the separation. Parents need to be patient in such a situation and let their children express their emotions to them. Divorce brings about new adjustments, both mentally and physically.
It would be wise for you to involve your child in establishing the new routine in the family. This will help you to know about the feelings and choices of your child and also help your child to feel secured.
Kids are more likely to adjust to a new life if parents are stable in such situations. Spending weekends interestingly with your child, bringing home a new pet or taking part in fun-filled activities together will ease the situation a lot. In case of any sign of mental distress, you may also consult a child therapist for proper guidance.
Divorce is definitely not a comfortable situation but parents can support kids to overcome the pain it brings. A loving bond with both the parents will ensure that the kid glides through this phase smoothly and lives a happy life throughout.
About the author: About the author: Alyssa Clarke is a blogger who is a strict follower of a healthy lifestyle. She enjoys writing on parenting and health related topics the most and is currently working on a post on the new rage in the kids’ toy world.