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How to Answer Questions About Your Divorce

Posted by J. Benjamin Stevens | Nov 30, 2014 | 0 Comments

Going through a divorce is undoubtedly difficult. Not only is there the financial and emotional weight of the process, but telling family and friends can create additional social pressure and anxiety. Even well-meaning relatives and friends can pry, causing you to rehash a painful topic over and over again when all you want to do is stop thinking about it. Hopefully, this article will help you learn how to answer questions about your divorce.

Resist the urge to gossip

Though prying questions can be stressful and invasive, sometimes it can feel good to vent. While everyone should have a few close friends or relatives to whom they can release frustrations, it is important to avoid spilling your guts to the whole world. Resist the urge to trash your ex or go into messy details about the divorce when asked by those in your social circle. This kind of thing can be a juicy topic of conversation, and anything you say can spread quickly to others you may not have intended to hear. Rather than worry about who has heard what, it is best to be careful.

You have the right to privacy

For those who truly don't want to air their dirty laundry, it can be hard to push back against family members and friends who want the inside scoop. They may have the best intentions by asking, but dredging up all the depressing details can make it that much harder for you to put the unpleasant thoughts out of your mind. In these cases where you truly don't want to discuss the subject, remember that you have the right to privacy. Though others can ask, there is absolutely nothing wrong with staying quiet. Choosing to keep the particulars of your divorce to yourself is a choice that everyone else will learn to accept and not something you should have to compromise on.

So what do you say?

So what if you find yourself being bombarded with questions about the divorce? You don't want to answer with specifics, but also don't want to be seen as rude. One approach is keep a practiced response in your head so that you are ready to go whenever you're asked. Something short, simple and vague is your best bet and is a good way to end the conversation quickly and painlessly. Saying something like, β€œIt's been tough, but I'm doing better each day. Thanks for asking.” Then ask something about them and what they have been up to, changing the topic of conversation away from your divorce without being abrupt or nasty.

Source: β€œThe Best Answer to Nosy Divorce Questions,” by Honoree Corder, published

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J. Benjamin Stevens

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