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"Winning" in Family Court Doesn't Look Like Winning Everywhere Else

Posted by J. Benjamin Stevens | Apr 09, 2018 | 0 Comments

Photo Credit: Japheth Mast,

It's no secret that a divorce is an extremely stressful and emotional situation to have to go through. It's even worse when you are the "wronged" spouse. Maybe you've been cheated on by your spouse. Maybe your spouse has squandered away most of the money you've worked a lifetime to save for your future. Maybe you are married to someone who has substance abuse or mental health issues and life with them has been abusive and very unhappy for a long time. It's not uncommon that spouses who have experienced such situations are anxious to start the divorce and to exact some kind of revenge on their soon-to-be ex-spouse. These feelings may lead you to look for an attorney who will "promise" to "win" the case big for them.

However, your definition of "winning" in divorce court and your attorney's definition of "winning" may be very different things. Your definition of winning may entail you calling all the shots and getting everything you want at the end of the case. Your attorney may view winning as getting you to the end of the case without having to take on more of the debt than your spouse - or in some cases, just the fact that a divorce was secured quickly is a win to the attorney. If you were to judge your attorney based only on your definition of "winning", you may conclude your attorney wasn't that great. However, the one factor that sets about the best divorce attorneys from the not-so-great ones is that the best attorneys will begin by setting the right expectations for you. They will face head-on the differences in your definitions of "winning" and explain early and often how a "win" in family court may take on different meanings depending on the facts of your particular situation.

Family court cases rarely have "winners" and "losers" and those who look at these cases from such a black-and-white stance probably will never be satisfied with any result they get at the end of their case. If two parties are seeking the help of the Spartanburg County or Greenville County Family Court, more than likely the break-down of a marriage is at the center of the case. Even if it was a bad marriage, there are a lot of complex emotions wrapped up in these cases, and when children are involved, the end result is a permanently altered reality for the rest of those children's lives. Rather than looking at "winning" your case, it may be better to view the success of your divorce or family court case on whether you and your children will "lose" less in the long run. Look for an attorney who is skilled, thorough, and easy to communicate with to represent you. Look for an attorney, not based on price, but on whether he will fight diligently for you; whether he will protect your interests at every turn; and whether he will thoroughly seek ways to limit your losses at the end of every day.

The Stevens Firm, P.A. - Family Law Center has provided exceptional legal counsel and support to families throughout South Carolina for over two decades, handling all matters of family law, such as child custody, child support, and divorce. We are well-equipped to handle all divorce and family law matters, no matter your circumstances. Contact us at (864) 598-9172 to schedule an initial consultation.

About the Author

J. Benjamin Stevens

Senior Partner


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